her.
Trixie
16 years old, trapped in an 11-year old's body
loves the scent of: cupboards, air conditioners, coffee, cinammon, and Bayo (as in the store)
moods too easily swayed by whatever music is playing
fickle, undecided, impatient, paranoid
Jason Mraz ♥
likes things clean, but is pretty messy
interested in photography (haha as if)
out of words
Wednesday, February 27, 2008!
HandWritten on; 1:54 AM
It's column time! Time to panic--again. I don't think I'll ever get used to making one. It's so different when you're writing something you know will get printed on paper, rather than something that'll be published virtually. I still find it nerve-racking to even THINK about having to write it. Urrrrrrrggggggggghhhh. I have got to learn how to NOT be nervous when it's time to make my column. See, what happens when I'm nervous is that I lose my writing style and the fluidity of the whole composition. The result would be a boring, disorganized essay, filled with highfalutin words which I tend to use when I want to sound at LEAST impressive. AND THAT'S JUST SO WROOOOONG. My gaaaaaaaawd.
Tell me where (our) MY time went
And if it was time well spent
Just don't let me fall asleep
Feeling empty again
Cause I fear I might break
And I fear I can't take it
Tonight I'll lie awake
Feeling empty
I can feel the pressure
It's getting closer now
Sigh, sigh, sigh. On another note, we're finished with our Music Practical Test. Everything was so chaotic at first. Therese H. left the CD with all Little Mermaid tracks in it, so she had to call her mom to bring it over to school. But thank God her house is only a tricycle away! Then when we went up to the IMC, the props people told us TRITON WAS MISSING!! But thank God (again) Jesileen's such a good artist, she managed to draw Triton on acetate and they were able to make a new one just in time for our presentation. Despite the fact that the puppeteers were having a hard time with the, er, puppets and that the cellophane background kept falling in the middle of the shadow play, I actually had so much fun. The whole thing was faaaaar from perfect, but I'd do it again anytime :)
Well, that's all for now. Time to read MPAD (chapter 16, yeeeey! progress! haha) and study for the last Chem quiz. TTFN! Haha, ang bakla :))
Speaking of bakla, Joy, aabangan ko ang future blog mo :P If you won't make it, I'll do it for you! Bwahaha :))
Wednesday, February 20, 2008!
HandWritten on; 2:39 AM
Mahirap pala talagang ma-LSS sa kantang di mo memorize ang lyrics.
Puro nananana or mmhmnnnannhnahahmmhmm lang ang masasabi mo sa parts na di mo alam.
Kaya ang una kong ginawa pag-akyat ko sa kwarto ayyy...
Tinignan ang iPod, hinanap ang kanta, pinindot at tinignan ang lyrics.
Ngayon alam ko na:
Baby it's alright now you ain't gotta flaunt for me
Even if we go dutch you can still touch my love it's free
AT!
I'm about to strip and I'm well equipped, can you handle me the way I are?
So. In conclusion,
Ready na ko sa duet natin, Torres.
I'm so gonna rock Keri Hilson's part :))
Saturday, February 16, 2008!
HandWritten on; 1:21 PM
I dreamt of being caught with a cellphone in school--AGAIN. I don't know how many times I've had the same dream! This time it was Ms. Toledo who caught me daw, and my phone was there because I accidentally placed it in my school bag or something. Argh. I know it's totally weird, and you'd probably think I'm such a goody-goody (well, at some extent, I actually am), but I think getting caught with a phone in school is my HUGE FEAR (I sure hope it's not my BIGGEST, else I'd be such a wimp). And it's funny cause I don't even bring it to school, except during bandfest! What's even weirder is that when I dream about being caught, I feel really really really nervous. To wake up and realize it's not real is such a relief. Really. God, I'm so paranoid.
Anyway, a couple of my titas+my mom are bringing my cousins and I to UST later for this homecoming thing (most of my mom's siblings, if not all 11 of them, studied there at some point). It's a huge event supposedly, since UST's celebrating their 400th year. We're all going to support my aunt who's emceeing later. Which reminds me, I still don't have anything to wear yet. I need something yellow/gold and white. I'll raid my closet as soon as I finish this Lit Analysis for our English term paper (ooh, that sounded so college-like. cooool. hahaha) :)
Friday, February 15, 2008!
HandWritten on; 4:57 AM
It's a happeeeeeeeeeeeee day. Haha. Post-Valentine's date with MAH LOVAHS, Joy and Mels (too bad MAH original LOVAH, Nicole Torres, didn't go. Tsktsk. Boo you). Saw some iii1 friends, then Angela A. joined us. Super bonding. Dumating rin ang totoong ka-date dapat ni Mels. Hahaha. Wait, how come I'm not writing in complete sentences? Hehe. Guess it's easier that way sometimes. Anyway, the whole day spelled F-U-N for me. Got to watch Jumper (Rachel Bilsooooon!! and fine, Hayden Christensen. haha. aand that British guy. SI CUTIE. hahaha), ate late lunch (NOT composed of meat, fyi. but we DID get tempted :P), then tried on dresses from different stores. Oo na, jologs magsukat nang magsukat kung walang balak bumili but I don't really care :)) I went home SUPER tired and happy. I thought of blogging as soon as I arrived but opted to crash in my parents' bed and watch some TV. HBO was playing Frankie and Johnnie starring Al Pacino and Michelle Pfeiffer and I decided to watch it even if I just did recently. It's a really nice movie, and I recommend that you head to Astrovision and get a 100-peso copy of it in VCD (just a tip, cause that's what I do with old movies). I must've lied down for a loooong time, cause I even got to finish the next movie on HBO which was It Takes Two (very young Olsen twins). And now I'm blogging :)
Anyway, I also wanna talk about yesterday's Palihan culminating activity. We went to Manila Zoo! It was so much fun. At first I was real excited cause Jhamel (pronounced Jam-eel), my supersmart supercute kidcrush was joining us. He had motion sickness in the bus on the way there, and yeah he puked and everything but as soon as we got there, he was back to his hyper self :) I was so glad he was there, on account of the fact that I don't have a Valentine and all :)) Haha kidding. I realized PLATONIC relationship lang talaga. No sparks e, just that giddy feeling when you see a nice kid. Hahaha. Oh and by the time the trip was coming to an end, we'd become thisclose-friends. He already told Jodie and I about his crush and how he planned to tell her. The conversation went like this:
Trixie/Jodie: May crush ka?
Jhamel: Oo.
T/J: Sino?
J: Si April May, kaklase ko
T/J: Ah talaga? Bakit mo siya crush?
J: Maganda
T: Matalino?
J: *shakes his head*
(laughter)
T: Sino mas matalino, ikaw or siya?
J: AKO!
T/J: E kelan mo sasabihin na crush mo siya?
J: Valentine's!
T/J: Eh Valentine's na eh!
J: Oo nga e. Pero di ko nga alam kung san bahay nun eh.
Hahaha. Kakaaliw talaga. It was like I was talking to a teenager already :)) Ah, and I wanna tell everyone that I've FOUND the PERFECT layout/skin. It seriously screams TRIXIE, but the thing is, the size is not right and I've no idea how to adjust the height and width. It only occupies a small box in the middle of the screen, so that's not good. If anyone knows how to fix it, please help me :)
I shall end this entry with quotes from Frankie and Johnny:
"I want to kill myself sometimes when I think that I'm the only person in the world and that part of me that feels that way is trapped inside this body, that only bumps into other bodies, without ever connecting to the only other person in the world trapped inside of them. We have to connect. We just have to. " -Johnny
"I am. I'm afraid. I'm afraid to be alone, I'm afraid not to be alone. I'm afraid of what I am, what I'm not, what I might become, what I might never become. I don't want to stay at my job for the rest of my life but I'm afraid to leave. And I'm just tired, you know, I'm just so tired of being afraid." -Frankie
"Now, there's a man and a woman. He's a cook. She's a waitress. Now, they meet and they don't connect. Only, she noticed him. He could feel it. And he noticed her. And they both knew it was going to happen. They made love, and for maybe one whole night, they forgot the 10 million things that make people think, I don't love this person, I don't like this person, I don't know this- Instead, it was perfect, and they were perfect. And that's all there was to know about. Only now, she's beginning to forget all that, and pretty soon he's going to forget it too." -Johnny
**Edit
Before, I couldn't think of ANY actress that could be a better Meredith Grey of Grey's Anatomy than Ellen Pompeo cause I think she's just perfect for the role and that she plays it so naturally. But a while ago I realized Michelle Pfeiffer could've been Meredith too. Well, you know, not now cause she's too old for the part. Just saying :)
Wednesday, February 13, 2008!
HandWritten on; 2:18 AM
I know i'm such a bitch today. Papa keeps hounding me with questions about what SHOES to wear for China. Shoes, freaking shoes! He just left wearing his third pair, asking me "Anong pinaka maganda out of the three?" My constant eye-rolling and "kahit ano" replies in a bored tone don't seem to give him any hint that I'm not in the mood. Normally I wouldn't mind answering vain questions even from my dad (e.g. "Kalbo na ba ko?", "You think I need a haircut?") BUT PLEASE NAMAN. They're only freaking shoes! And one more thing, don't blame me if i answer your Religion pericope questions with unenthusiastic one liners. It's the freaking hormones. Besides, who would want to answer questions about something she doesn't even completely understand? I'm trying to figure it out, too, people. Nangangapa lang din ako.
Huh. Bet your bitch radar's going super waaaang waaaang right now. Whatev.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008!
HandWritten on; 2:24 AM
I'm currently scanning through the Skins of the Day in blogskins, hoping to find something that's really... ME, since everybody's saying they don't like my new layout (TSSSSSSS). This is harder than I thought. Ang hirap talaga pag tanga sa paggawa ng mga layout chuva (expression for the past week. arggh). Asa ka lang na may gumawa ng something na perfect for you. In which case, never siyang pwede maging perfect for your personality kasi di naman ikaw gumawa. At mahirap din na walang ADOBE PHOTOSHOP. Hahaha. But whatevs. Grabe, all I see are skins na "perfect" para sa friends ko. I saw one that'd be great for Chex (white and blue, with clean and simple lines), and one for Pink (obviously, pink siya. and may closet full of clothes and shoes, etc). Ano baaaaaa.
By the way, ano ang difference between SKIN and LAYOUT? :))
Told you. TANGA.
Sunday, February 3, 2008!
HandWritten on; 12:06 AM
Pagod na ko.
I know I shouldn't be, but I am.
Think: fish taken out of the water for, say about 8 months (suppose it's alive. nearing death, though). Fish put back in a bowl for, like two days. Then fish taken out of the water again, for about another 2 months.
I'm just so tired.
As in, pagod na pagod na.
Not physically.
But I this kind of tiredness is even more exhausting than being physically tired.
It just goes on and on and on and on... and I want it to stop.
I want to NOT care about anything in the world.
To stare into space for as long as I want and not fear every single tick of the clock I lose by doing so.
I want to STOP rushing.
It seems that it's all I ever do. Rush, I mean.
An ordinary day would go like this:
Wake up 5 minutes late.
Squeeze taking a bath, dressing up, eating breakfast, fixing my hair, and brushing my teeth in 50 minutes.
Panic if traffic's heavy along Katipunan or Q. Ave.
Get in class. Hear the warning bell.
Get things from my locker before the electric bell rings.
And then it's battling with either boredom or brain exhaustion for 8 or 9 hours.
Until the bell rings for the final time.
Fix things, put stuff in my locker--still in a fast manner because my friends would be waiting for me.
Get in the car. Sleep a total of 50 minutes--60, if traffic's bad--until we get to Antipolo.
Rest for about 20 minutes.
Do homework, study for quizzes, do stuff for the Mag--all before 10PM, my ideal bedtime.
Panic when 10's nearing, and I haven't finished everything yet.
Sleep at 10:30-11 (because I never make it on time).
Hear the annoying and extremely loud alarm clock at 5.
And then I go.
Same old routine.
Every SINGLE DAY.
I'm tired.
But I bet you're tired too.
Because who wouldn't be?
